Spidder Parker loves the baseball
by meguy42
Summary: Spidder Parker got sad after greem goblin killed his favorite GF. Now Spidder Parker has his revenge by bringing Gwen Stacy back to life.
1. Chapter 1:Peter Man is sad because Evil

Chapter 1: Peter Man is sad because Green Goblin Evil

Spider man was sad after Gwen Stacy's neck snapped.

So he said "why green goblin!?" and cried tears.

"BECAUSE I AM EVIL AND I LIKE KILLLING THINGS BECAUSE I AM GOOD AT IT AND YOU WERE THE ONE WHO KILLED HER WITH YOUR MAGIC WEB THINGIES."

But Spidder Parker had an idea he would use science! (BTW spider Parker is like super good at science and stuff, he also made web shooty things so he could easily doo like anything he wanted with science which was good because it would make him less sad). So Spidy started work on a sciency potion that would make Gwen Stacy back to life.

Spider man carried Gwen Stacie's dead body beack to his place where he lived but so did Aunt May and Doctor Octopus because they were really in love and spider man first felt bad but then he later didn't because doctor octopus was niecr now and not as mean. Spidder Man had to hide the copse because he didn't want anyone to find it. Then he died science. The science was hard so it took him a long time but then he had to go out and do things so he left and saw some of his friends and said hi. Then when spider man came back he realized he forget to do his laundry so he did his laundry.

Spiderman also saw a movie with other people and that made him less sad. But still not happy. On the way back spider man saw batman and punched him bekuz DC sucks. Then when he was at his place where he lived he said,

"I must live up to my family name and do what has to be done. Full life consequences. Because that is my favorite fanfiction and John Freeman is Best Freeman."

Also spider parker had to make a sorting algorithm thing for a comp sci project so but he forgot how so he just did bogo sort because and said,

"bogo sort best sort". Said Spidder Parker.

Spidder Parker was also hungary so he decided I will eat a sandwich and he went to the sandwich store and bought a sandwich. It was at this sandwich shop that he met uther Spidder Parkers and they said you aer a clone and we are the real Spidder Parker. But Spidder Parker know that he was Spidder Parker so he punched them but then realized he dindt have a belly button and he was like. "I AM A CLONE!111!". Then Spidder Parker went home because he was sad. So Spidder Parker got on the computer and started typing things that were commands.

Then Peter Man typed in git push origin master because he was using VCS and stuff and he was 1337 H4x0r. Then Spidder Parker looked at the log thingies on git and saw that heavy from tf2 was beeting him in number of commits and also additions but not deletions so spider parker aws like I'll show u! So spider Parker started making changes to the code that made it better and also added lots of comments and the number of additions and also commits whent up and it made him happy so he dicided to go back to work on his sciency potion but he had to get more ingredients so he went to the store but the store didin't have the things he needed like radioactive sipiders so he remembered that his blood had radioactive spider stuff and he weas like "oh yeah I can use that" so he did.

After long time and not sleeping spider man made the thing that was a sciency potion but it didn't givfe spider man extra arms this time like before because he remembered and also he was giving it to Gwen Stacy but Gwen Statcy diden't git extra arms either.


	2. Chapter 2: Spidder Man Makes Back GS

So Peter Parker was using the potion that was sciency and stucff, so he put it it in Gwen Stacie's mouth.

Then Spidder Parker said, "I LOVE THE BASEBALL!"

The fluids in her mouth were absorbed and made her wake up from death but she was a zombie so she didn't smell good. Spidder Parker diden't care though because he was in love with Gwen Stacy and he didn't care about smells. But Gwen Stacy was also evil because she was a zombie and she wanted to eat peoples brains. This made spider parker sad but he had a good idea for a solution that would solve his problem.

So Spider Man decided it was time to Spider Man about a bit to find the antidote thing and then he came across a snake and the snake was long and Peter brought it back and made Gwen Stacy better. The antidote to the venom came from a snake that was poisonous but being poisen made it not poisen so he was able to give it safely to Gwen Stacy after killing the snake which was easy because he was spider parker so he grabbed a gun from a police officer and shot the snake which is normally hard because snakes are small but not for Spidder Parker because as has already been established Spidder Parker is 1337 H4x0r. Then a hobo said grats for killing the snake I thought it would eat me because it is a snake but you killed it and made me safe can I get autograph because you are famous. Spidder Parker gave him an autograph and said "Who are you. I can't tell because I can't read and reading is hard can you tell me and sSpidder Parker replied Spidder Parker."

Then Spidder Parker went to the store to buy sandwiches but he met a guy on the way and said high to a dude he saw who was named steve Stevington. And they were like hey bro how goes it pretty good that's good do you want to hang out later tonight with Gwen and Me yeah that sounds fun cool I'll see you later then and they were like yeup.

Then Spidder Parker was at the store and he saw Dr. Octopus so he was like, NOOO Doctor Octupus, you are evil and I will kill you and then eat you. So Spidder Parker did that and it was really easy because he was spider man enve though Doc Oc was like super strong and stuff and had extra arms tthat were like intelligent and stuff but it didn't matter because spider parker was strong 2. Then Spidder Parker put the octopus meet in the sandwich and gave a sandwich to Gwen Stacy and they ate it but then Gwen Stacy turned into a zombie again so Spidder Parker had to go to find the snake venom again and do all of that stuff. After all of that Gwen Stacy was not a zombie any more and just a regular person like you or me or steve stevington.

After all that Spidder Parker was really tired so he slept but he had bad dream nightmares about horses eating at him, this would prove to be prophetic after an alien invasion with horse aliens that eat people. Also he saw a guy waving to him but that might also have been real life because that never happened in real life so it actually wasn't a prophecy thingy. Also Spidder Parker was sad even though he had his favorite GF back but he didn't care because he knew he would be eaten by horses just like that song by the Rolling Stones.


	3. Chapter 3:Spidder Parker learns Kung foo

Spidder Parker was already good at punching things so he didn't need to learn Kung Foo but there was a guy who said that Spidder Parker Sucked because he didn't do kung foo so Spidder Parker took lessons from kung fury who showed him how to du kung foo. Kung Fury had a really deep voice that sounded like gravel but that didn't bather Spidder Parker so he took lessons from him where they practiced by punching things and also kicking things. Spidder Parker thought it would be useful when he needed to fight the evil alien horses that he knowed about because of a dream he had that had evil zombie horses that ate people.

When Spidder Parker did the kung foo he got better at it until he was as good as kung fury and that made kung fury sad and cried tears.

"I AM SUPPOSED TO BE DA BEST THAT IS THE PROFFECY AND YOU ARE MAKE ME SAD HE SCREAMED!111!1!" said kung fury and punched Spidder Parker.

Spidder Parker was now good at kung fu though asnd he newed everything Kung Fury did so he dodged all of the kicks and punches and said "I AM NOW KUNG FURY YOU ARE NOT KUNG FURY" this made Kung Fury cried evne more tears until his face was read from tears. "I'm Sorry said Spidder Parker". I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. Then they learned that friendship is the real kung foo.


	4. Chapter 4:Spidder Parker godes on Date

After saving Gwen Stacy they decided to celebrate by going out to dinner. Dinner was tasty and it felt good to put tasty things in your mouth so they ate.

"MMMH" said Gwen Stacy while licking her lips.

"You are starting to smell better." Said Spidder Parker, but it wasn't true and he just said it to make her feel better even though she was a zombie and didn't have feelings.

"Thanks, I used horse shampoo this morning."

After they got home from the date they kissed but Spidder Parker had to stop because she smelled bad but he couldn't tell her why cuz she was dead but didn't know it and thought she was a live.

Spidder Parker then went to see his friend Steve Stevington and was taken away by his beauty even though Spidder Parker wasn't gay even thoug being gay is totally ok and some of my best friends are gay and they can get married to whoever they want. Steve Stevington had long but well groomed hair that was dark and rich like chocolate. He didn't wear any makeup but you could be forgiven for thinking he did because he had no imperfections on his face. He also had one of those chin thingies that look like butts butt are really sexy! He was also super buff and strong and you could tell by looking at him that he was like super strong and worked out all the time. He was even more buff than spider Parker and Spidder Parker is really buff so that is like really super incredibly buff even though he didn't have super powers… to his knowledge.

Spider Man asked him, "Do you ever stop and really question yourself?"

"How so?"

"Why we do it, why we press on in the face of unending torment. Do you ever wonder what your true purpose is? I've learned that with great power comes great responsibility, but how do I know that my actions are just. Perhaps I should have just let her go. Is it better to die a human than it is to live as a monster?"

"I 'dunno, that's rough. When did you get all phillosophical and stuff?"

"Ok then" Then Spidder Parker left and swung around the city for a while and beat up bad guys cuz' he's Spidder Parker and he is super good at fighting bad guys. Unfortunately Spidder Parker got shot by a gun but he was like I'm Spidder Parker, GUNS DO NOT HARM ME!111! and he punched the guy who shot him. Then he went home to do his math homework. He was doing stuff with linear algebra and matrices it was mostly pretty simple like finding Eigenvalues and Eigenvectors for a given matrix in R^2.

Then Spidder Parker slept and he slept for a long time but when he woke up he felt so refreshed that he almost made it 3 feet before falling asleep again because he had narcolepsy. Butt only temporarily as a side effect of being shot so it doesn't get in the way of his crime fighting or anything because he normally doesn't have narcolepsy. After walking around in the street he met Gordon Freeman and was like hey hows it going and then he was like it sucks here because I'm like a less powerful version of iron man and then he didn't actually say any of that because he can't speak because he's Gordan Freeman and a headcrab ate his vocal cords. But he was able to give that information to Spidder Parker because he had a pen and a piece of paper and Gordan Freeman new how to write and read unlike the hobo.

Then Spidder Parker remembered the dream he had about horse MicJagger and that was prophetic again because he also saw a spaceship and said, "OH NOESZ IT BE ALIENS!1!1!"


	5. Chapter 5:Spidder Parker fights aliens

Spidder Parker saw the aliens come out of the space ship and they looked like horses and they also new the lyrics to pizza burnin and suang it when they trolloped out of the space ship. Then thay sang trollololol and shot lazers from their moughs because they sang trollolololol and Spidder Parker said NOOOOOO they are evil aliens we must kill them!111! Then the horse aliens ate people because people taste tasty if you are a horse. Then one of the horses stapbed Spidder Parker with it's horn and Spidder Parker was bleeding and he said ow. The horse said you will be vary tasty and tried to drink the blood but then was like ew this is spider blood and it tastes bad so I will not eat you even though you are mean and then Spidder Parker said no I love the baseball and punched the unicorn. Then he kicked the unicorn and it fell over and the Gordan Freeman shot unicorns with sawblades that he launched with the zero filed point thingamagiger.

There were also zombie goast who helped in the fight and everyone was like yay when Spidder Parker and Gordan Freeman one and …

Spidder Parker said "I couldn't have done it without you."

"" Replied Gordan Freeman. Then Gordan Freeman returned to black mesa to do science.

Spidder Parker felt happy that he had cilled the evil horse aliens that were killing people and eating people so then he was like horrray! And he sat on the copse of a dead alien horse. Then there was an expolsion in the space ship and Spidder Parker went to investigate it because he was a detective so he looked inside and saw a super zombie alien HORSE! Spidder Parker remembered what Kung Fury taught him, punch things until they fall down. Spidder Parker was good at punging things so he looked at the horse zombie and punched it, "GAAAAHHH" it screamed because it was angry so Spidder Parker shot it with a web and did krazy kung foo that involves spinning around and punching and screaming and puncking and kicking and dodging attacks andhe was like, "I AM SUPER GOOD AT NOT BEING KILLED BYH ZOMBY HORSE ALIENS!" and then the zombie horse fell over because it was dead.

A reporter came and it was spider Parkers boss! "Good job Spidder Parker, even though I hate you." he said then Spidder Parker punched him and took pictures because that was his job.

Spidder Parker web slunged around and looked at the horses then he jumped on some of them because they weren't all dead yet. He was really good at attaking horses and it was really impressive to everyone around who was like wow Spidder Parker is really cool and I wish I were Spidder Parker…

so Spidder Parker said, "the power to be Spidder Parker was in you all along, you just have to belive that you are Spidder Parker."

So all of the people started web slanging around because they now new how to be Spidder Parker. One of the people said I am bored now I want to be a princess. But Spidder Parker didn't know how to be a princess so he had to go somewhere else to find a princess to teach him how to be a princess.

Then medic from tf2 came and healed Spidder Parker because he was still bleading evne though he was punching things. So Spidder Parker sat down and ate doc oc sandwiches because he kepth them as leftovers to eat later. Then Spidder Parker slept but he was eaten by a horse.


	6. Chapter 6:McGoodness

Then Spidder Parker woke up and it was all a dream, except for all of the parts that weren't when he got eated by a horse.

Then one of the horses said "we are nice horses, we just eat people because we are hungary. " So Spidder Parker decided to meat up with Steve Stevington and said. "We will go to McDonalds for Justice and responsibility!" So they went to McDonalds and ate hamburgers. But Spidder Parker decided not to tell the horses where hamburgers came from because they might think that cows are horses and then they would get sad and then they would start murdering people because they aer evil horses but they actually are only hungary.

THE END!1! Thank you so much for reading my awesome fanfic it was super hard to write and it took a super long time so and it is also my first fanfic so please be nice and don't be mean because I hate meanies and if you are a meanie I will make Spidder Parker come to your house with his horse friends and kill you and then eat you!111!1! JK I won't actually do that becuz Spidder Parker is not real and he only exists in comic bookds that are awesome and by the way u should totally listen to my favorite rolling stones song I don't want my Pizza Burning. It is truly a mestarpiese and the best part is the singing because MicJagger hads a really great voice.


	7. Chapter 7:The baseball givethand the bas

Spidder Parker was walking around then he saw a pumpkin and remembered it was Halloween so he eated candy so he got fat but worked out and lost weight but then he saw the green goblin doing crime.

Then Spidder Parker was fightin crime against the green goblin and steve stevington came at where spitder parker was and was like O I'll help you defeat green goblin then he shot green goblin and they were happy and they danced and danced then they cried. Spidder Parker then went to the store to bye sandwiches and steve stevington came too because the were feinds. They ate the sandwiches and spider parker said "I love the baseball"

"Plot twist I am the baseball" spoke steve stevington

"No you tell lies that make me sad"

"No I have knife and the baseball giveth and the baseball taketh away". Steve stevington pulled out a knife and fought with spider parker and even though Spidder parker was really good at fighting steve stevington used the powers of his buffness to fight spider parker and killed him.

"I am sad because you murdled me." Said Spidder Parker with his last dying breath.

"the baseball giveth and the baseball taketh away" said steve stevington.

Steve stevington was sad but he knew it had to be done because the powers of his buffness told him that spiidder parker would tern evull and start eating people just like the horses who went to MicDonads. Steve stevington would have to become the new super hero and use the powers of his buffness to fight crimes like steeling and eating in the middle of the road. This wos the end of Spidder Parker but not of steve stevington.


End file.
